When the Day Ends ( I saw yoru SOUL)

When the Day Ends


we were happy
we were working together
we were happily ever after.

we were friends,
we were lover,
we were the luckiest.

But when the day ends,
I could not find your smile.

I was like a ghost
hanging around on Sunset Blvd.

I was, crying,
crying for whom?
I was happy, happy for whom?
You did not know, you may never know.

I was trembling like a child,
everybody saw the emptness on my face,
I was looking for you!

I was looking for your shadow,
I was looking for your....fragile

I was looking for your
breath, face, love
I could not hold myself.
I don't want to hold myself.
I never want to hold myself.

I am a child.

I could not wait,
I never be able to wait,
I am madly in love,
in love with you.

I could not even control myself.
I don't want to control myself.
I was crazy,
crazy for you,
I was insane,
insane because of you.
I was sober,
sober for you.

I was killing myself
for... you.

you did not know,
you may never know.
Today is the first day.
Tomorrow may never come.

I was crying , crying for you,
I was longing, longing because of you.
I was bitching,
bitching for you.

I was mad, madly in love with you.

But when the day ends,
I was naked,
when the day ends,
I was far from heaven.
you were sleeping,
you may be sleeping now.
You may never know my heart, my blood,
my fragile feeling and emotion,
my flowing pain....

I was looking for a broken soul.
I was looking for you.



I saw your soul


You touched my soul
you ruined my life
you loved me
deeply,
you fucked me
crazily
we lived in that small dark room
for the rest of our lives

baby
I'm singing this song
because of you
I'm singing this song
because I saw your soul


I dig the gold
I found my heart
I found myself lying on the ground
for a reason I can never reach
this is something called crazy
this is something called fantasy

I dropped my tears
I dropped my tears again in this fucking city called
The Angeles

I failed
I stood up
I wiped my tears
I cleaned my blood
I love to fuck
I love to create a world I call LOVE

(Pain)--Most of the time

Most of the time I don’t speak
Most of the time I don’t talk
Most of the time I don’t look for answers

Most of the time
I like to be alone
Live in the void
Waiting for the pain diminished

Most of the time
I live in the void
So I don’t speak I don’t talk
Most of the time
I’m god
When the pain flies away from the cage


10/28/07 Hollywood Copyright Niki Yan

I Miss You

--- listening “Emmanuel” by Aeon Broke


I miss you, & this is an ancient feeling
I miss you
Like I miss myself

I miss you cause the sun blinded my eyes and the wind banished my dreams
I miss you.

I miss you cause my heart hanging over your shadow, and the rain washing down to my bones

I saw myself flying like an angel
I miss you.
at the edge the shore, at the edge of the bubbles
I saw my heart hanging ( without longing) just empty
It disappears in a life time ( and darling, how long is too long?
how long is forever, and how long it takes to climb a mountain, and how long is the way to death and how long to reach my destiny?)

I miss you when the day comes
I miss you when the night comes
I miss you when the sun disappears
I mss you when the heaven coming to earth and we fly away

I miss you cause I lost my vision I miss you cause I can’t see myself, the wings are broken and the feet are vanished
to the horizon.
I miss you and I’m counting the time between two bubbles. ( Darling, how long to comb your hair? and how long is forever?)

The sky is blue, the wall is cold
The air shattering between my toes
I miss you, like I miss a foreign fossil

The ice is breaking, the darkness emerges into my lip, as a whole,
and yes, I miss YOU!

( Where am I going from here?
Darling, darling, you know the answer!
Where are we going from here??)

I miss you.
The air is cold, the voice soars
And I miss you

I miss you like I miss a lost soul
I miss you like I miss the dazzling light on my own roof,
I miss you like I miss the light at night--shines on my tear—And, yes, that’s the last drop.

I miss you cause I see your finger tips and the snow lotus
I saw my own tears falling down on my own
finger tip ( and I recognized… that is YOU!)

I miss you & this is an ancient feeling
I’m sitting here in my own destiny

I’m sitting in my own destiny
And
MISSING
YOU.

( Yes, darling, you know the fear will never go)


Niki Yan 10/27/07 a dark night in Hollywood

LOVE, PEACE, ABUNDANCE -- HEAVEN on EARTH

Know that I am angel....know that
You are Angel

Know that You are Infinite
You are LOVE
You are Infinite LOVE

You are DIVINE
Everything RESIDES in YOU!!

And you are so loved
And you are eternal...
Think what you TRULY want
Think what you truly feel important...
Trust Your Heart
Follow your inner voice
Believe the Higher Guidance
Have faith in GOD
Cause
GOD
IS
YOU.

He
Never
Left
YOU.

GOD
IS
WITHIN
YOU.

ALWAYS.
Before you were BORN and
after YOU DIE.

YOU ARE DIVINE.

YOU ARE LOVED.
So, anything is POSSIBLE....
JUST TRUST
That DIVINE ORDER

You are Perfect, and Everything is Perfect
RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW

all THE DOORS ARE OPEN FOR YOU NOW

so ENJOY!, Laugh!! SMILE!!! LOVE.

HEAVEN On EARTH?

YES.

--- LOVE for everyone , Niki




The Infinite LIGHT--JUST SHINE
-- Inspirational & truthful Message from Prem Rawat/MAHARAJI

Somebody once asked me, “How would you describe what you do?” I said, “I am the one who carries the mirror, puts it in front of people, and says, ‘Look at yourself. Do you like what you see? Great. If you don’t like what you see, maybe you can fix it.’ This is all I can do—carry the mirror.”

Some people don’t want to look in the mirror. A lot of people feel threatened by the subject of peace because they don’t want somebody to redefine their world by telling them what peace is, what joy is. I am here to point out some simple facts: This is your life. You exist. You’re here temporarily, and this earth is temporary. One day—not tomorrow—it is not going to be here.

Recently, I was on a veranda overlooking the city. It was still early. All you could see were lights in people’s houses. It looked so tranquil, but there are incredible dramas going on. There are people who are happy or unhappy, people who are fighting or just want to sleep. Amongst those lights, new hopes are being formed and dreams are being shattered. A drama behind a veil that seems so tranquil. An incredible drama.

So, you have this ability to reflect. What do you want to reflect? Do you want to reflect peace because you feel peace, contentment because you feel content? Would you like to have a slight tinge of gratitude? Do you want to feel joy? A joy that is real, that comes from within you, that does not seek triggers from the outside? These hues are not imagination. They have to be real. If they’re not real, their reflection will not happen.


A lot of people say, “Oh, I have felt peace before.” This is like saying, “I don’t need to eat today; I ate last week!” Some people think you feel peace once in your life, and that’s it. No. You need to feel peace every day of your life—that’s the kind of peace you need.

People go near a quiet lake and say, “Oh, it’s so peaceful.” Quietness is not an attribute of peace. They have a definition of peace and go around looking for it. But if you’re looking for peace by description, you will never find it. Why? How do you search for something you already have? The word “searching” assumes you’ve lost it. But you never lost it. It’s within you.

You have an amazing possibility, and that is to reflect the color of the infinite that is within you. Forget green, blue, and yellow. If you are going to reflect a color, reflect the infinite. This color has shades of peace and hues of contentment. Not questions, but answers. Not ideas, but realities. When you begin to be filled with the color of what is within you, you shine.

As long as you’re alive, the light is shining. You need to shine, too. It can happen Now.

$30000 Needed right way!!!--Generocity and the world Happiness

to pay my bills. esp. my CREDIT card bills, I used to pay 5% interest, now they just raised my APR to 30%!!!! and I can't afford it, so I said, " Fuck it, I am going to pay it ALL off!"


They say, " Ask, you shall receive."



Being generous is NOT to lose
to lose to gain
to give to obtain

we should share everything on this planet....cause anything material/outside is ONLY a illusion, your inner happiness is the ONLY thing counts, your inner joy...

The Tao teach people to be generous and kind...loving and live in the widsom, in that way, you can gain more...both outside and inside...in that way, you will have your inner peace and happiness ( Isn't it our ULTIMATE GOAL??)

we should share everything on this planet, cause nobody actually owns nothing.

If you want to Gain More both financially or Non-financially. You MUST GIVE.
Giving means you have no fear; Giving means you're living in the peaceful and happy center of your HIGHER BEING, esp. for those who are in NEED.

Sponsor/Investor needed for my BOOK

I am still looking for a sponsor/investor to help me financially so I can finish my book. The MISSION is urgent! I believe GOD will bring me the RIGHT PERSON!

道

I suggest everyone to read Dr. Wayne Dyer's book: " Change your THOUGHTS, Change your LIFE-- Live in the WISDOM of TAO."

A sage( Lao Tzu) in Ancient China 2500 years ago wrote this Masterpiece " Tao Te Ching" which I call it the modern Bible. It speaks the truth. It's beyong all the religions, and it includes all the religions. It's everything. It's GOD. It is the HIGHEST　Power. It's everywhere. It's LOVE. It's eternal. It's infinite. It's YOU. IT's TAO. It's THE
Universal POWER. IT's NOW. It's the future. IT's Your heartBEAT. IT's YOUR SOUL. IT's YOUR NATURE. It's EVERYTHING. YOU may call it GOD. It's INSIDE OF YOU. You are NOT ALONE.

"There is NO way to happiness. Happiness is the WAY."

"In the perception of the smallest is the secret of clear vision; in the guarding of the weakest is the secret of all strength."

-- Lao Tzu